Spring arrived a few days earlier than the old norm.  I know this because yesterday I felt as if I had the Flu.  I blamed the delicious piece of cake I ate for lunch, or the climb up the fire stairs, owing to a broken elevator at the Dermatology Office, or a half dozen other things before I realized I had ingested pollen…lots of pollen…the Cherry trees I admired as I drove are in bloom.

This is so annoying.  I have loved being out-of-doors all my life.  I was a Girl Scout, then a Girl Scout Leader for goodness sake. Now my GP has me on Singular, which my asthmatic granddaughters take, and I have air purifiers in almost every room.

When did I become such a wimp?  My reflection in the mirror in the Dermatology office examining room reveals I look sturdy, solid even. With short grey hair, long corduroy pants and sensible shoes, I even look almost formidable.

I think the Dr likes me, an important aspect of a day when he sees a patient every ten minutes, although it has more to do with his outgoing personality, than me. Most of his patients are older women who don’t look like Valerie Harper.  Although we would like to think he can tell us apart, I believe we must all look alike in our uniform clothing.

 For example, yesterday, the Dr thinks I’m his patient because he has seen me several times for surgical procedures.  He is mixing me with other old people growing barnacles.  However, his partner Sunny is my regular Dermatologist, the one who knows my name and examines me every three months and discovers ‘stuff.’

The new offices are a maze, a warren of small spaces. Yesterday, when I popped out a different side of the waiting room to let David know I was ready to go home, he said, “You came out a different door,” with surprise in his voice. The waiting room filled with elderly mostly women, erupted in laughter.  Okay he is a cute old guy, but why was that so funny?

Thus, by the time I went to bed ast night my head was aching and my nose running from the pollen.  Plus, I had pulled a groin muscle and my knees hurt from climbing the fire stairs. I felt awful. The metro closure for 27 hours meant commuter traffic would be horrific around our streets this morning, so I avoided going to the pool. I’ll go back on Friday, by then the scar from the latest growth removal will be healed enough to enter the water safely.


IMG_0898.JPGBecause we’re experiencing weather fluctuations, up one day and down the next, I decided to make one last pot of soup for lunch…my favorite white bean and kale soup. I made the soup, clipping herbs from my indoor pots, while David shopped for groceries.  When he entered the house with bags of food, he said,”Something smells good.”  Now, we’ve had lunch and he’s off again to buy more bird seed before he takes his nap.

We moved the feeders to the back yard where the birds can easily fly to cover if the neighborhood Cooper’s or Sharp-Shinned hawk descends. One day, Mr. Hawk landed on the fence about ten feet from me.  When he touched down he reminded me of those jumbo jets that bounce on their big rubber wheels when they land.  Hawks must have built in springs I think.


I asked David to bring paper bags from Trader Joe’s so I can load more books for the thrift shop.  He’s hauled hundreds of books already and barely made a dent.  My books are all hardcovers and some of them are out of print or rare. If I weren’t so lazy I’d try to sell them online, but I did that for a while and found it boring.  If I had the money I’d spent on books I’d be wealthy, but I never cared for wealth.  All I wanted ever was to have enough.

Someone asked me once “what is enough.”  Enough is what I’ve always had because I was lucky, worked hard and happened to be born in the good old U.S.A. Although some of my ancestors suffered deprivation, I have always had food to eat, a roof over my head and was relatively safe, unlike those poor refugees sleeping in the mud under plastic bags on the Macedonia border.

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Great Great Grandparents (M)


Great Grandparents (D)

Harry (1857) and Minnie

Great Grand parents (M)

28 thoughts on “Frustration

  1. Your ‘enough’ is ‘enough for me too. (Any extras on top of ‘enough’ have been greatly appreciated, but we could have managed without them. Still could.)

    When I had my Medicare ‘well old-person’ checkup last summer, the PA gave me six words to remember, then asked me to repeat them after a bunch of other requisite questions … I remembered the words just fine. Then, after the rest of the exam and getting dressed, I got off the table and walked straight into another examining room instead of the door to the waiting room. (They didn’t commit me to memory care, but I bet they made a note.)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hope you’re feeling better. I keep meaning to tell you that every time I click on your blog I see how dull my template is in contrast. I like how colorful yours are but I guess I’m a creature of habit and low key must come from my old New England background ! Ugh.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It never rains but it pours.

    A cliche, I know, but cliches were once pithy sayings.
    I hate having one thing after the other going wrong. I want to roar and rave and howl with bad temper and frustration. Who said getting old is a picnic and we should be glad ?

    I go out for a meal and need to go through the rigmarole of things I can’t eat. Pollen makes me sneeze and my eyes run, cigarette smoke makes me cough instantly, even when I’m still 20m away.

    As for people generally? Keep them away from me or I won’t be able to answer for the consequences.

    Liked by 1 person

    • And people carry germs. I’m a germ fanatic, but having spent the first decades of my life suffering with bronchitis and pneumonia and nasty colds, Ive protected myself in old age with inoculations for Flu and both types of Pneumonia, as well as constant hand-washing and a purse loaded with Hand-i-wipes.

      My daughter and two granddaughters who teach stay sick from constant exposure to children. Children are little germ carriers.


  4. Policemen here have a habit of looking as though they just finished their last year at high school :).
    So far I’ve only come in contact with mature looking Drs and as I haven’t been inside a hospital for many a year have no idea what the young interns learnibg their trade look like these days.
    And yes your soup has a good healthy look to it!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Art has gone to three different doctors this month and we noticed the same thing about doctors looking younger and younger. Sigh…
    I wish I could be there to see the cherry blossoms.
    I’m sorry about your allergies. My daughter is giving up and getting allergy shots.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Pollen has hit me hard this spring too (Denver). Eye irritation is usually the worst part of it. Didn’t used to be so bad, but our immune systems weaken with age and I’m no spring chicken anymore.

    Liked by 1 person

    • My GP spends much more time with me. The 10 minutes refers to the time for a dermatology screening. My Dermatology Practice is almost overwhelmed by all the new Medicare and Medicaid patients. Some of these patients drive from WV or MD.


  7. I hope you feel better soon. I’m sure that soup must have been very comforting. I’ve just found out that I have some ancestors who came to America and who are buried in Arlington. It has amazed me how many of my relatives came to America (on my mother’s side) as far back as the 1700s.


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