No, this isn’t the tale of Marilyn Monroe, whose husband Arthur Miller wrote a “biography” about her with the same title. This the story of an old woman who was minding her business, standing and waiting for her husband to open the front door, and fell on her Gluteus maximus.
It wasn’t pretty, and soon she was surrounded by men..her husband, her neighbor Eddie and three paramedics, all trying to get her off the ice patch where she sat.
I tell a lie…fortunately, before rescue arrived, she asked her husband to retrieve a kneeler she keeps in her garden shed, and she was able to hoist her 72-year old body upright with arms strengthened from a year of canes, walkers and wheelchairs associated with joint replacement surgery. Sadly, before her kneeler arrived, her pants froze to the ice. Her knees, one of them a prosthetic were very cold.
Well, I can’t go on with this tale of woe. Suffice it to say it was me, and I ended up in the emergency room with a very sore butt. X-rays showed nothing broken, and otherwise intact arthritic and prosthetic hips. And my Gluteus maximus muscles are very sore.
The moral: It can happen to you.
I am so grateful to my Mom who, during WWII, while raising my sister and me mostly on her lonesome (dad was chasing illegal aliens, then working with various logging crews in remote locations), kept a cow, chickens and a vegetable patch. Rationing was in effect in those days, but because I ate healthy foods at an early age, my bones are in terrific shape. My Orthopedic surgeon says they are “beautiful.”
We lived in East Texas in those days, and had access to fruits and veggies including oranges, much of the year. Thus I ate a good diet which gave me a head start in life. Good nutrition is important, especially for children. But many people are nutritionally illiterate and their children suffer the consequences.
I know some people have made fun of Michelle Obama’s attempt to feed children better foods via school lunch programs, but she’s onto something.
Eventually, Dad went to work for the Department of Agriculture, and *The Progressive Farmer* magazine arrived on our doorstep every month. In the 1940s, many more people farmed than would after WWII when a huge industrial boom led to the mass migration of former farm workers to urban settlements.
These days, most of us find ourselves in these settlements, sans, cows, sans chickens and sans vegetable patches. Huge agribusinesses have replaced many of the small farmers (A Thousand Acres, by Jane Smiley, 1991), although my granddaughter Joy, who is majoring in agricultural science tells me small farms are making a comeback. In the spring, she is off to Germany to study dairy-farming, European style. The desire for
Joy with one of the cattle at Virginia Tech, 2013
a glass of good wholesome milk continues.
**The Progressive Farmer — Founded in Winston, North Carolina in 1886 by North Carolina native Leonidas Lafayette Polk (1837–1892; a Confederate Army veteran who is often confused with CSA General Leonidas Polk), the publication was intended to bring the latest information on crop and livestock production to the newly united nation’s agrarian economy in the Southeast. After Polk died in 1892, Clarence H. Poe from Raleigh, NC took over as editor in 1899, and in 1903, he and three partners purchased the publication, taking it from a newspaper to a magazine with 36,000 subscribers by 1908. One of the most notable achievements of the magazine was its continual crusade and endorsement during the early twentieth century of the land grant college subsidies provided to Agricultural and Mechanical colleges across the United States (Wikipedia, 2014)